Christianity
If you want a good laugh, read Christian apologists try to explain who Cain’s wife was.
http://www.christiananswers.net/q-aig/aig-c004.html
(Short version: He didn’t necessarily marry his mom, so it’s no problem. Adam lived to be 930 years old and they had lots of children [33 sons & 23 daughters] so Cain either married a sister or a niece [not clear how the niece thing helps since the niece would have been the product of a brother and sister marriage], but that was ok then and it’s only later because of genetic defects caused by sin and God’s curse that incest is now problematic.)
QED
Whew! So relieved I don’t have to believe that we are descended from ape people. Gross.
Jesus was NOT a zombie. (He was a lich.)
Sam Seder on Rick Perry’s Save the Christians Ad
If this is going to be a Christian nation that doesn’t help the poor…
Jen Lein “If this is going to be a Christian nation that doesn’t help the poor, either we have to pretend that Jesus is just as selfish as we are or we’ve got to acknowledge that he commanded us to love the poor and serve the needy without condition. And then admit that we just don’t want to do it.”
– Stephen Colbert
(repost – thanks, Jege)