The Queen of the Altar Society
a play in one act
by
dustin hansen
copyright April 2000
by Dustin Hansen
dustin@silentmouth.com
Cast of characters
| Carol | An elderly woman in hospital bed, dying of cancer of the womb. |
| "Rue" (Rupert) | In his fifties, father to BOY. |
| Dave | Around age twelve. |
| Susie | |
| Ladies of the Altar Society (Merva, Ethyl, and Melody) | |
| Nurse | |
| Second Nurse |
Cast of Characters
Carol: An elderly woman in hospital bed, dying of cancer of the womb.
“Rue” (Rupert): Carol’s son. Around sixty years of age. “Blue collar” worker.
Dave: Rupert’s son. Around thirty years of age. Still a student, working on his doctoral thesis.
Susie: Rupert’s sister in law. A peculiar woman, maternal with everyone regardless of age, relation, or social status.
Ladies of the Altar Society (Merva, Ethyl, and Melody): Church acquaintances of Carol and of Rupert. Old gossipy types who like to reminisce when together and tend to talk about little else than old times. Always people and rarely ideas.
Nurse
Second Nurse
Scene
A hospital room. White. Lights dim most of the time, only the fluorescents above night stand glowing. When room lights in ceiling are turned on, hard abrasive white light. Carol occupies the bed nearest door. A curtain separates this from a second bed, in which a second occupant recently died.
Note: there should be a sharp symmetry to the room. One bed on each side of invisible bathroom door, which divides the space in two.
Time
The present. About three weeks after Carol was admitted, after having given up on chemotherapy. She has been given increasingly larger doses of morphine to ease her pain and has gradually sunken deeper and deeper into herself, into a semi-unconscious stupor.
SETTING: The hospital room. Only door down right. Downstage center is where the bathroom door would be; bathroom itself is down off the stage on floor in front of audience; there is no door frame, and the only indication is a roll of toilet paper on floor. Window stage left. Two beds, heads upstage. State left bed empty and perfectly made. Several comfortable chairs, a table with height adjustment. A small fridge. Carol lies dying. On her back, tilted ever so slightly to the left. (I.V. and other trappings.) Emaciated, skeletal, trenches for cheeks. Short straight and stringy pure white hair. Has lower teeth intact but no uppers, the upper lip curled under, the lower jaw seeming to lunge out menacingly and in perpetual agony. Mouth ever open. Eyes either closed or slits struggling to open, to become eyes again. Body concealed by bedsheet, head appears strangely disembodied. Shiny earrings in both ears. Breath very intermittent but regular, and intense when it comes, like a wheeze, as though in a patterned signal she suddenly remembers she is not breathing, gasps, forgets again immediately, sleeps an instant, remembers, gasps. Rupert, her son, sits in the chair opposite door, elbows resting on knees, head resting on fists. A shelf on upstage wall and one on stage right wall. Numerous cards and flowers. Also a ceramic doll, still in her box, and a grinning garden gnome holding a rake.
AT RISE: Same as above. Evening. No light changes. (Soft light comes through window, growing gradually darker and fading to black by end of play.)
Note: Carol and Rue do not walk onto stage, but are there from the very beginning. Nothing changes from the moment house opens to the moment action begins. The only transition is: the heart monitor begins to beep, steady but very slowly; this continues until the house is quiet. (If this proves implausible, Carol and Rupert should remain absolutely frozen [with exception of Carol’s struggling breathing], and action begins when Rupert begins to move–to pace, or whatever is necessary to suggest that the play has begun. If even this is too subtle, Carol also is frozen and begins breathing when Rupert begins moving.)
(Long silence. CAROL breathes. RUE rises, searches heart monitor. Switches something. The beeping stops.)
(Sits. Sighs. Silence.)
RUE
They’ll be here soon.
(pause)
The ladies from the church.
(silence)
I’ll bet they’ll have goodies with them. I’ll bet anything they’ve got goodies for you.
(pause)
Allan’ll be here later this afternoon. You want to stay awake for Allan, don’t you? Don’t you wanna see Dad?
(pause)
Mom?
(long silence)
(Gradually, but as if by incantation, she begins to wake, opens eyes, looks around.)
CAROL
Who are you?
RUE
It’s Rue, Mom.
(pause)
Your son. Rupert.
CAROL
Do you have eggs? A tray of eggs? For me? This morning?
RUE
No, Mom.
CAROL
Mom!
RUE
It’s night time.
CAROL
I just woke up.
RUE
I know you did.
CAROL
You’re in my room.
RUE
Yes, Mom. I know it.
CAROL
What are you doing in my room?
RUE
Nothing.
CAROL
That’s funny.
(pause)
I . . . I had that strangest . . . there was a man, and an old woman–she smelled of medicine. Like cough syrup . . . and they were standing over me. I was in their shadow. And they were praying.
(pause)
I thought . . . What a dream.
RUE
You weren’t dreaming, Mom.
CAROL
I . . . I was on an altar.
(pause)
RUE
That was right here. This bed. This room.
CAROL
And flowers–half dead, sort of faded and brown. This lady–she made the sigh of the cross. Oh God!
RUE
You mean the sign of the cross.
CAROL
And these flowers, she held in my face, and said, “See? See what we’ve brought you?”–Or, no, it wasn’t them that brought them. It was someone–She said, “See what so and so brought for you?”
RUE
I brought them. It was Rupert.
CAROL
No no, you weren’t there, young man. Right in my face. And then they lay them down. On me. Right on top of me. On my belly. But I couldn’t’ feel anything. I couldn’t feel them on me. Or see them. But I know they were there. And then the shadow went away. With the two strangers.
RUE
That was your sister. And Father Molloy.
CAROL
And I knew then that I was dead.
(pause)
In the light. Alone.
(silence)
RUE
Are you in pain?
CAROL
There’s not music.
RUE
There’s no radio. I can’t sing, but I’ll sing if you want me to.
CAROL
I don’t want anything. Me? I don’t–Music? Ha ha. Where has it all gone.
RUE
There never was any. I can turn on the T.V. if you want.
CAROL
Me? I don’t want anything.
(silence)
You’re still here.
RUE
Yeah. I’m not goin anywhere. Don’t worry.
CAROL
Worry? Who said I was worried? . . . I’m gonna miss the bus.
RUE
What?
CAROL
There was another–a some body, talking about . . . Oh, what dreams! She–I think, yes a she I think–I couldn’t see her, raspy voice, that was all, as though in my ear. Like a tiny raspy bug No way finding it out, getting it out of you Mean. Die in there and that’s where you stay Ever. And pretty soon it’s full Over. And all the dead voices there clog your ear and nothing gets in. Or out. And they spread into your skull. In side you Back. And fill you up. Until you’re empty. With still voice Still.
(silence)
RUE
Mom?
CAROL
She’s not here.
RUE
Who, Mom?
CAROL
What?
RUE
Are you all right? Do you know my name?
CAROL
What’s the matter with you? Don’t you know?
RUE
Do you want to sit up?
CAROL
Ha! Are you my father? Are you . . . who are you?
RUE
Rupert, Mom. Your son. Rupert.
CAROL
I’ve seen you before.
RUE
I should think you have, yes.
CAROL
Yes, at a parade. You were marching and beating the living daylights out of some goddamned drum. Would have strangled you if you hadn’t been my father.
RUE
Mom, I’m not your–
CAROL
You were in my dream too. And the tin man. With no guts. Ha ha. Excuses excuses. Well?
RUE
Hmm?
CAROL
I don’t know, what are you looking at me for?
RUE
You want to go back to sleep?
CAROL
Hm hm hmm. Sleepy. Sleepy bye. Am I sleeping now?
RUE
No.
CAROL.
Well. I should take something then. I should sleep. Eh?
RUE
If you want.
CAROL
I should wake up, and live a little, and get myself tired, so that I can get to sleep. Shouldn’t I.
RUE
I don’t think you should try to get up, Mom.
CAROL
Well you do a lot of thinking, but I’m the one’s got to put the bacon on and see that they don’t choke each other or throw each other in the well or something before the biscuits are baked. That nasty Rupert, he’d throw his own grandmother in the well, he would. No time when the eggs are sizzling and the kids poking with sticks and my migraine back and sleeping sickness with one in the oven arching my back over the wretched smoking stove making sure the whole place doesn’t go up in smoke. But you do what you want. . . . All my life . . . And nothing to show for it.
RUE
Don’t say that.
CAROL
What?
RUE
Don’t say things like that. It’s not good for you.
CAROL
Well who’s it good for, then? Who’s anything good for? What’s good for anybody?
RUE
I just meant–
CAROL
Don’t tell me what to say. What things. Who are you to say? Who are you? What are you doing in my room? Without any eggs or anything?
RUE
Nothing.
CAROL
You’ll miss the bus and then don’t come crying in my aprons.
RUE
I don’t have to be anywhere.
CAROL
That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.
(pause)
So then why are you here? Eh?
RUE
To be with you.
CAROL
So you don’t have to be anywhere so you’re here. Eh? What’s that make you?
RUE
What, Mom?
CAROL
What’s that make this? Eh? Nowhere? What sense does that make, Mister?
RUE (laughing softly)
Sure. I guess you’re right.
CAROL
Who are you to tell me I’m right? So you don’t have to be here either. Do you?
RUE
I suppose not.
CAROL
So go then. Why aren’t you going? No one’s keeping you.
(pause)
Fine. You’re not here. You’re not going. And neither am I.
(RUE takes her hand)
(without moving:)
What are you doing?
RUE
Nothing.
CAROL
Well stop.
RUE
I’m just holding your hand.
CAROL
Well aren’t you just the tinker’s cuss. Give that back now. It’s not yours. It’s not yours to play with.
RUE
You can feel that? . . . Squeeze my hand.
CAROL
What am I, a milking cow?
RUE
Please. Just squeeze it.
CAROL
I am. I’m crushing it. Aren’t I?
(pause)
Is it crushed?
RUE
Yes.
CAROL
Good. That’ll teach you to meddle with strange women. Now put it down, now.
(He releases her hand.)
Is it . . . You know, I have no body.
RUE
Oh?
CAROL (mockingly:)
“Oh?” Oh ho, oh woe, woe is us. No. Of course I don’t. Do you see it anywhere? Bring it here. Bring it to me. I can’t feel it. . . . I can’t feel a thing.
(silence)
That voice. That raspy voice. . . .
RUE
Yes? What did it say?
CAROL
I can almost hear it. Still. . . . “When she passes on” . . . “What will he do when she goes?” . . . “When she goes” . . .
RUE
We’re all concerned for Allan.
CAROL
Who?
RUE
Allan.
CAROL
Allan who?
RUE
Your husband? My father?
CAROL
My husband never cheated on me. Not even when I was in the war. He’s faithful as an old dead dog. He wouldn’t father an illegitimate child if his life depended on it.
RUE
You’re my mother, Mom. And Allan is my father.
CAROL
Poppycock.
RUE
But he’ll be well looked after.
CAROL
My father is Terrence. I meant my husband. You see?: you’re getting me all mixed up.
(pause)
Well I’m never getting married. Not in my lifetime, sonny. Not even after that. Not ever. I’ve seen married people.
RUE
Well he’s going to miss you. But he’ll get along all right in the end.
CAROL
Who? What do you mean? “The end”?
RUE
I just meant–
CAROL
Why are you watching me?
RUE
I’m just here with you. I’ll look away if you want me to.
CAROL
Well you look at what you like, old man. But don’t you touch. Or I’ll have you in my custody quicker than you can say “schnizelkoff.”
(pause)
You’re never leaving, are you.
RUE
No. I won’t leave. I’ll be here with you right up until the end.
CAROL
The . . . end. . . . Once upon a time, The End. Now where have I read that? My Momma used to tell me that story. Before I was born. . . . No, I wrote that. What goes in the middle? What is in between? Do you remember? . . . No, you’re right. That’s right. That’s it. Nothing at all. Nothing is needed. It’s perfect. It’s God’s gift. Once Upon A Time, The End. And you close the book. And maybe you burn it on the wood stove. And you go to sleep. She’s already asleep. You tuck the blanket around her. She’s just a head, a sleeping little pretty weeping head. You want to close her mouth. But she has to breathe. In her sleep.
(pause)
And you can’t stand to watch her cry, and breathe, in her sleep.
(pause)
And so you tuck the blanket over her head, behind her ears.
(pause)
And you whisper to her, so softly that she cannot hear you.
(silence)
Am I dying?
(pause)
Tell me. I’m dying.
(pause)
Tell me!
RUE
You’re dying.
CAROL
Ha. Who’s dying.
(pause)
Nobody.
(pause)
Who?
(pause)
You! You! You say you! Say you!
(pause)
You won’t say you?
(pause)
Not even for your dear old dying mother?
(silence)
RUE
You.
CAROL
You? You’re dying? Ha! You’re the picture of health. A bit faded. A bit worn around the edges. Hanging there a bit crooked. Ha ha. But something to look at.
(pause)
Tell me: I’m dying.
RUE
You’re dying.
CAROL
No! No no no! Tell me, “I’m dying.” Say, “I’m dying.” “I’m dying!” Say it!
(pause)
Say it!
RUE
I’m dying.
CAROL
Am I?
RUE
Yes.
CAROL
But what’s that mean?
RUE
I don’t know.
CAROL
“I.” Or “you.” What’s it mean, old man? You going to sit there like a dead deaf mute, or are you gonna try a little talkin now and again. What’s it mean? Eh? What? What’s it mean?! What does it–
RUE
I don’t know! How do I know what anything means?!
(silence)
CAROL
She kept saying it. That voice. “Passed on.” “When she goes.” How strange. “Goes.” It’s plumb nuts. Goes where? That’s what I’d like to know. When she stops she should have said. Where she goes when she stops. But people don’t always say what they mean. Do they?
RUE
Because they don’t know what they mean.
CAROL
And neither do I. So leave me out of it, that’s all I ask.
(pause)
Or they don’t mean anything at all. You can say anything when you don’t have a meaning.
(silence)
You see what I mean?
(pause)
RUE
No.
CAROL
Neither do I. But that’s what I mean.
(silence)
I’m dying. And I’ll go on this way forever. I’ll just keep dying again and again. Until the end of time. I’ll never finish. I can feel it.
(silence)
But time has no end. Does it.
(pause)
Forever.
(pause)
Maybe at the end of the goddamned rainbow. Maybe at the end of the yellow brick road I’ll finally get to the godforsaken Oz. And then I’ll die.
(silence)
RUE
(gets garden gnome from shelf, carries it over to her, holds it in front of her)
We brought Terrence.
CAROL
That lyin cheat. I don’t give a good how-do-ya-do if I never see that body-snatchin low-life thug another second of my life.
(studying gnome)
Who is this?
RUE
Terrence. Doesn’t that make you happy? Does that bring back anything?
CAROL
Oh! Terrence! Little Terry! He’s always been like an only son to me, that precious midget.
RUE
He’s a gnome, mother. He’s just your gnome.
CAROL
Yes, but he’s always liked to be called a midget. I don’t know why. A dwarf’s a dwarf, I always say. That’s my philosophy. Oh, yes. Sing to me, Terry. Little Terry. My pumpkin. My overgrown green squash.
(pause)
Put him back on the shelf.
RUE
Don’t you want to look at him?
CAROL
Look schmook. He’s always sung more sweetly from on high.
RUE
(replacing gnome, sadly)
All right.
CAROL
I remember we used to take him caroling, every Easter. The first of the month. What a joy. His voice doesn’t carry very far, you know. He needs a megaphone’s what he needs. Don’t you, Terry. He has to put everything he has into it. His whole body and soul and little midget might. No, in my night time, we had to scoop everyone up with an iron fist, the whole family, the cat, the snouscher, the silver goldfish, friends, neighbors, noblemen, countrymen, acquaintances, strangers, enemies, store mannequins, lettermen . . . the lot. The whole kaboodle. We weren’t very popular. But no. No one munchkin can do it alone. Or go it. Which is it, do it or go it? Well he’s but a speck of gruel in a hot pot of porridge, one midget. Or a cold pot. Any pot bereft of comfort. No, you need a herd of midgets to carol properly. A hoard. A herd of hordes. Yes, that’s what you need: A herd of hoards of caroling midgets with megaphones, of all different races and backgrounds, all classes, because it takes all kinds and all shapes, all untied in one holy symphonic harmony of worship and awe and reverence and bunny rabbits. But mostly awe. At their little devotion. They stand at attention in awe of their wee selves. Yes, we must have more. More! More! More!
RUE
More what? Devotion?
CAROL
Midgets, more midgets! Terry! Round up the troops. There’s going to be a lynching. With refreshments to follow. You must recruit all the little people on the planet you can. As soon as possible. No, sooner than that. Easter’ll be here any minute now. Any second. I’m not going to be around much–Oh! There he goes! That’s it, Terrence.
(pause)
You hear that?
RUE
No.
CAROL
Just like a wee lark. A shrunken crane, the way he blesses the air with his harmonious breath.
(pause. She listens, enraptured.)
Oh! Oh, no! Terrence! Do you need some water, Terry? Quick! He needs some water, fetch a pail. He’s choking! Don’t just sit there!
(RUE goes to sink, fills glass with water.)
Were you going to just sit there like a mote and watch him gargle himself to death? Get going! Get it to him! Or there’ll be hell to pay! They stick together, those puny rapscallions.
(RUE brings water to the gnome, in a slow and melancholy manner. She watches anxiously.)
Oh! There. Wait. He’s coming out of it. He’s breathing again, don’t drown him now. He’s all right now. He just maybe had a toad in his throat, or a garden snake. He won’t perish. Not while I’m around to look after him. I’ll watch over you, Terrence my boy. My love. You shall never perish. No one shall ever perish, so long as I have them in my sight.
(silence)
We stick to our guns. To our tomahawks. To the subject at hand. We stick to the rooftops like termite leeches. You’ll never squash us. We keep to our selves. We keep to our kind. We keep in our cellars, our kitchens. We’re too small to be squashed. Our rinds are too thick. You think we’re one place and then we’re somewhere else. You think we’re one thing and then we’re something else altogether. It never fails. We’re sticking around. We’re in it for the long haul. You won’t haul us oft in a trough. Not in my lifetime. Not if my dead body has anything to say about it. You’ll find yourself in a quarry. In a quarantine, that’s where you’ll be. With no one to pull the shutters for you. And no respite. Absolutely no refuge.
(pause)
And I’ll be right there over you, throwing crackers through the glass.
(silence)
(CAROL begins to cough. Falls partially asleep.)
You can keep your collars and your fallen obelisks. That’s what I say.
(Coughs. Then silence. CAROL resumes state of semi-consciousness, close to complete catatonia again.)
(Chatter in hallway, growing louder.)
(Three ladies, MERVA, ETHYL, and MELODY, the ladies of the Altar Society, enter chattering and laughing vivaciously. MERVA carries a pan with tin foil wrapped over the top.)
MERVA
Hiiiii, Carol!
ETHYL
How are you feeeeeeeling?
MELODY
You feeling better?
MERVA
You look great.
MERVA
Look at your pretty white hair!
MELODY
I never see that hair, Carol!
ETHYL
You should go without your wig more often.
MELODY
Yes, you should!
MERVA
I think so too.
(sudden silence)
Has she been awake at all?
ETHYL
Has she said anything?
MELODY
Has she asked about us?
MERVA
How’s she doing?
(pause)
RUE
No.
(pause)
I don’t know.
(pause)
She hasn’t been awake enough to talk.
(pause)
MERVA
Hm. That’s not like her.
ETHYL
Not a bit.
MELODY
She’s always been such a chatterbox.
(pause)
MELODY (to MERVA)
Show her the brownies, Merva.
MERVA
Oh, yes! Here you go, Carol. Look what we brought you.
ETHYL
She can’t see them from there.
RUE
Oh, here, I’ll get out of the way.
(moves out of the way, stands downstage center where door to bathroom would be)
MERVA
(moves around to left side of bed where RUE had been standing, holds pan out in front of CAROL.)
See? They’re brownies!
RUE
I don’t think she’s awake, really.
MERVA
Well, we’ll just set them over here for you. Don’t spoil your supper though, now.
(sets pan on a shelf)
Well, would you look at all the cards.
MELODY
Isn’t that something.
MERVA (with a touch of envy)
Everyone loves you, don’t they, Carol.
ETHYL
They sure do. We love you too, Carol.
MELODY
Yes, we all love you, Carol.
(Pause. They stand looking down at CAROL.)
RUE
You can sit down. You don’t have to stand.
ETHYL
Oh, lovely.
MERVA
Thank you, Rupert.
RUE
Here. Take my chair.
MELODY
Don’t mind if I do.
MERVA
You sure you don’t mind, Ruey?
RUE
No, I’m tired of sitting. It hurts my back.
MERVA
Oh, well, in that case . . .
(RUE moves his chair to other side of room, by window. The ladies sit on cushioned chairs on other side of room, beyond the curtain which presently is open. ETHYL sits on unoccupied bed. RUE returns to where he had been, stands looking down at CAROL.)
We don’t want you throwing your back out.
(laughs)
MELODY
I don’t know if you should sit on that, Ethyl.
ETHYL
Why not? I’m not sitting on anybody, am I?
MERVA
No, there’s no one there, Melody. They won’t mind.
ETHYL
I don’t think they’ll mind.
MELODY
These are lovely chairs.
MERVA
Aren’t they, though?
ETHYL
I could use a chair like this.
MERVA
That’s not a chair, Ethyl.
ETHYL
Oh, they won’t mind.
MELODY
No, she means it’s a bed. You said “a chair like this.”
ETHYL
Oh! Ha! Well I could use a bed like this, too!
MERVA
What would you do with it?
MELODY
Don’t you have a bed, Ethyl?
MERVA
Sure she does. She’s got two, one for her and one for Leonard.
ETHYL
I’m never going to stay in some hospital. That’s for sure.
MELODY
Everyone stays in hospitals, Ethyl. Don’t be above everybody.
MERVA
Not everybody.
MELODY
Like who?
ETHYL
Ted Hatley died standing up. Out watering his roses.
MERVA
Oh! Those roses. They were all dead and withered and it was the middle of winter and–You remember?
ETHYL
Yes I do.
MERVA
He just kept on watering them. Day and night.
ETHYL
Yes, and the whole flower bed was nothing but a huge sheet of ice.
MELODY
Oh, and the cat!
ETHYL
The what?
MELODY
The cat.
ETHYL
What are you talking about.
MELODY
Don’t you remember that story?
MERVA
What story, Melody?
MELODY
Huh. Well I sure do. They couldn’t find the cat, and so then–
ETHYL
The Hatleys never had a cat.
MELODY
Of course they did.
ETHYL
Did they?
MERVA
Not to my knowledge.
MELODY
They most certainly did. And they lost it. They looked all over for it. And so finally they asked Ted, Ted? Have you seen the cat anywhere? And he could barely speak at that point.
ETHYL
Ooooh! I remember that.
MERVA
Poor Ted.
MELODY
So he just says, Roses.
MERVA
Roses?
ETHYL
They could understand him?
MELODY
Well, just about. But he said it a few times, and everyone thought he was asking for someone. Like he was calling out the name Rose. Some old mistress, she thought. Some waitress. But he was saying “Roses.”
MERVA
What did he mean?
MELODY
Well they didn’t know. But they figured it out, because they finally went out to the shed one day to get a rake.
ETHYL
A rake? In springtime? What on earth for.
MELODY
Hm. I don’t know. I hadn’t thought of that.
MERVA
She’s making it up as she goes. Look at her.
MELODY
No, it’s what I heard.
ETHYL
Well somebody made up that part about the rake.
MELODY
Well maybe it wasn’t a rake. It doesn’t matter.
MERVA
O.K., Melody. So they go out to the shed.
MELODY
Yes, they go out to shed, to get something, and there–
ETHYL
Oh, no, Melody!
MELODY
Yes. There was the cat. Frozen to the bone, its tail gone, but still alive. Shivering like there was no tomorrow.
ETHYL
Well was there a tomorrow?
MELODY
Oh yes, it lived. It was just crazy after that. I mean it was always a little weird.
MERVA
So he’d locked it up then?
MELODY
Locked it up tight. They had to break in, because Ted couldn’t remember where he’d put the key.
MERVA
What for?
MELODY
Well, the cat had gotten into his roses.
ETHYL
What roses?
MELODY
Well, no, that’s just it. It was just a sheet of ice. But he was sooo mad. He wanted that cat kept out of his roses for good.
MERVA
Hm.
MELODY
Yup.
(pause)
ETHYL
Is there anything in that fridge, Rue?
MELODY
I’ll see.
(ETHYL opens fridge to look, sticking her head in and talking from inside.)
RUE
Yeah I think there should be.
MERVA
Oh, good. Any apples in there?
MELODY
Oh, I’d kill for an apple right about now.
ETHYL
I’d die for some pudding.
RUE
I guess I haven’t looked.
ETHYL
Oh, that’s all right, Ruey. Don’t you worry.
MELODY
You just sit there, Rue, and leave it up to us.
MERVA
Don’t you worry your pretty little head about it.
MELODY
We’ve got it taken care of.
ETHYL
Oh, look! Here we are. This must be our lucky day.
MELODY
What have you got?
ETHYL
You could survive a holocaust with what’s in here!
MERVA
Well what is it?
ETHYL
(comes out with an apple and a sealed cup of pudding)
It’s tapioca.
MELODY
Urgh!
ETHYL
Well, beggars can’t be choosers.
MERVA
Anyone claim that Macintosh?
MELODY
No, you take it, Merva.
MERVA
Oh, you’re a lamb.
ETHYL
Mind if I have this juice, Ruey?
MELODY
Oh! Juice!
ETHYL
It’s apple.
MERVA
Not tapioca?
ETHYL
Ha!
RUE
No, you go right ahead.
ETHYL
You’re a prince, Rue. Anyone ever tell you that?
MERVA
I have. Many times.
RUE
No.
MERVA
Well not to your face.
(RUE switches on the heart monitor. Sudden silence except for beeping. RUE stands, staring bitterly at CAROL.)
MELODY
Well what were you saying before we came in?
RUE
Who, me?
MELODY
No, I was talking to–
MERVA
Who, me?
MELODY
No, Ethyl. What was it? Something about one of the Gundersons?
ETHYL
Oh, yes. Let’s see . . . Merva, do you remember?
MERVA
No, it was . . . one of the twins.
ETHYL
The Gunderson twins. Melody?
MELODY
You were saying one of them wore a beard.
ETHYL
That’s right.
MERVA
But we couldn’t figure out which one.
MELODY
And I said I think it’s Jacob.
ETHYL
Not Jesse?
MERVA
No, she’s right. She said Jacob.
ETHYL
But I mean wasn’t it Jesse who wore the beard?
MELODY
No, Jacob.
MERVA
I think they both wore a beard.
ETHYL
But not the same beard?
MELODY
Hahahahahahah!
MERVA
You’re sure you’re not thinking of Alfred?
MELODY
Don’t you mean Albert?
ETHYL
No, I’m pretty sure . . .
MERVA
Now which one’s he again.
ETHYL
Which one’s who?
MERVA
Alfred.
ETHYL
He’s related to . . .
MELODY
Whatsername. She was at the funeral.
MERVA
Which funeral?
MELODY
Whatsisname’s. What is it. Sounds like hand. Hance. Or Hansen. Or Hatney maybe. That’s it. Hatney. No, wait.
MERVA
You mean Hatley?
MELODY
Yes, Hatley.
ETHYL
But he’s not dead.
MELODY
Isn’t he?
ETHYL
No. I saw him at the church bazaar.
MELODY
Oh, no I know. But . . . which Hatley?
MERVA
Holden?
ETHYL
No, that’s his father. He died years ago.
MERVA
Who’s whose father?
ETHYL
Holden is father to . . . Oh, shoot. Let’s see.
MELODY
Is it Gordon you’re thinking of?
ETHYL
That’s it. Gordon.
MELODY
No, that’s not him.
ETHYL
Sure it is.
MELODY
No. I saw–now who was it . . .
MERVA
Oh, she means the church bazaar.
MELODY
No, I mean the funeral.
ETHYL
Whose funeral?
MELODY
Elliot! That’s who it was.
ETHYL
Who did you see at his funeral?
MELODY
I can’t remember, if it was . . .
MERVA
But he had a beard?
MELODY
Did who have a beard?
MERVA
The one at the funeral.
MELODY
Elliot did. But he was in the casket.
ETHYL
No, dear. The man you saw.
MELODY
I’m not sure. I think so.
MERVA
Wait now. Which funeral?
MELODY
Elliot’s.
MERVA
But which one?
ETHYL
How many funeral’s do you think a person needs, Merva?
MERVA
No no, I mean which Elliot?
MELODY
Hatney.
ETHYL
Hatley, dear.
MELODY
Yes, that’s it. Elliot Hatley.
MERVA
Wait now. Elliot died?
MELODY
At least I think it was him.
MERVA
Huh. I never even got an invitation.
ETHYL
Hahahahahaha!
(pause)
MERVA
Well anyway, I know Jesse.
MELODY
Yes, I know him too.
ETHYL
And you think he’s the one who wore a beard.
MELODY
I don’t think so.
MERVA
Well I do. I’m positive of it.
MELODY
I think she’s right, Ethyl.
ETHYL
Oh, sure. Melody’s always right.
MERVA
It’s not a question of right or wrong, Ethyl.
ETHYL
Well, maybe I’ve got him mixed up with someone else.
MELODY
The Johanousbergs have beards. Maybe it was one of them.
MERVA
Which ones?
ETHYL
How many Johanousbergs are there, Merva?
MERVA
Tons. Dozens. They’re everywhere, everywhere you look it seems.
ETHYL
Don’t be ridiculous.
MERVA
But what I mean, is which ones wore beards.
MELODY
All of them. They’re a bearded family.
MERVA
Are we talking about the same Johanousbergs?
ETHYL
Well which ones are you talking about, Merva?
MELODY
If they have cattle then we’re talking about the same Johanousbergs.
MERVA
Beef cattle? Or dairy?
MELODY
Dairy.
MERVA
O.K. Yes I think that’s them.
ETHYL
Of course it’s them.
MERVA
But there was another family of Johanousbergs who had beef cattle.
ETHYL
Who? You mean Glen?
MERVA
Yes, Glen and Edna.
ETHYL
They sold those cows years ago.
MERVA
Did they?
ETHYL
Of course. Why wouldn’t they?
MERVA
But I’m saying, they had them though.
MELODY
So what, Merva?
MERVA
So they’re not the same family.
ETHYL
Well of course they’re not.
MERVA
I’m saying, if they didn’t have beef cattle, then they might have been the same one.
MELODY
You mean if they had dairy.
MERVA
Yes.
ETHYL
Merva, you’re a nincompoop.
MELODY
Now, Ethyl. Let’s now get snippy.
MERVA
So you’re saying they all had beards?
MELODY
I think so, yes.
ETHYL
Even Jacqueline?
MELODY
No, she has a moustache.
MERVA
Oh, that. You can hardly notice it.
MELODY
Yes, but when the light plays on it just right.
ETHYL
She should do something about that.
MERVA
You know, I heard she’s not doing so well.
ETHYL
Really?
MERVA
Not at all.
MELODY
Oh, that’s awful.
MERVA
And she still has to take care of poor Glen.
ETHYL
You mean Roger.
MERVA
Oh yes, that’s right. Roger.
MELODY
How’s he doing these days?
MERVA
Oh, not good. Not good at all.
MELODY
That’s just awful.
ETHYL
It is.
(pause)
(DAVE walks in. He wears a hat, a turtle neck under frayed cardigan sweater, heavy old worn brown coat and boots. Face stubbled.)
RUE (smiling genuinely)
Hey, Dave.
ETHYL
David!
MELODY
Merva, look. David’s here.
MERVA
Well would you look who it is.
DAVE
Hey.
RUE
I was wondering if you were gonna make it down.
DAVE
You didn’t think I’d come?
RUE
Well, I mean, I’d begun to wonder. That’s all.
(pause)
MERVA
Of course David came.
MELODY
He loves his dear old gramma. Don’t you, Dave.
ETHYL
Sure he does.
MERVA
How could he not?
DAVE (to RUE)
How’s she doing?
RUE
Oh, ‘bout the same.
ETHYL
Doesn’t she look pretty? In her white hair?
MELODY
Oh, yes! Would you look at that hair!
DAVE
Yeah. I’ve never seen it before.
MERVA
And those earrings of hers?
RUE (to DAVE)
No, I hadn’t either.
MERVA
No one had!
ETHYL (fondly)
She was always so vain about her looks.
MERVA (with a touch of spite)
Always had to be the center of attention, you know.
(silence)
RUE (to DAVE)
Take a seat.
DAVE
No, that’s O.K. I don’t wanna sit on the bed.
ETHYL
Oh! Merva. Give David your chair.
MERVA
Oh, all right, sure. Here you go, David.
DAVE
No, that’s fine. I’ll stand.
MELODY
Take mine, Davey. Davey Crockett.
DAVE
No, I’ll just stand.
ETHYL
Nooo. Are you sure, Dave?
DAVE
I wanna stand.
(pause)
ETHYL
Well, all right. Stand, then.
(pause)
ETHYL
What about you, Rupert?
RUE
Huh?
ETHYL
You want your chair back?
MELODY
Oh, yes. I’m sorry, Rue. Here you go.
(stands, brings her chair back around to RUE)
RUE
Yeah, that’d be O.K., thanks a lot. Just for a minute.
MELODY
Oh, it’s nothing. Keep it as long as you need.
ETHYL (to MELODY)
Here, sit down next to me. David? You sure you won’t sit?
DAVE
I’m sure.
MERVA
No. It’s awful.
MELODY
Yes. Come on, David.
ETHYL
Let him stand if he wants to.
(pause. DAVE continues to stand, clearly uncomfortable and awkward, across from RUE.)
RUE
She hasn’t really been awake. They’ve got her on a lot of morphine.
MERVA
Yes, she’s really sleepy.
MELODY
She’s been sleeping since we got here.
ETHYL
Since before that, Melody.
DAVE
Has she eaten anything? She looks . . . I didn’t even recognize her.
MELODY
It’s that white hair.
RUE
No, not really. They’re giving her nutrients through the I.V. She can’t really swallow. Just enough to keep her hydrated and so they can administer the morphine, without . . . Potassium, I guess.
MERVA
That’s all a person needs.
MELODY
I read that somewhere!
ETHYL
What.
MELODY
That a person can live forever on nothing but milk and potatoes.
MERVA
Yes.
ETHYL
Really? Well I’ll be damned.
MELODY
Ethyl! Really!
MERVA
Why can’t you just say I’ll be a monkey’s uncle like everyone else?
ETHYL
Well, I s’pose. You’ve got your protein and your potassium.
(silence)
You know, my father had a beard.
MELODY
See now I never met your father.
ETHYL
That doesn’t mean he didn’t have a beard.
MELODY
I didn’t say he didn’t.
MERVA
He still wears it?
MELODY
No, he’s dead, dear.
MERVA
Is he?
MELODY
Certainly he’s dead. Isn’t that right, Ethyl.
MERVA
Oh, when did he die?
ETHYL
Years ago.
MELODY
When was it, Ethyl?
ETHYL
Oh, I don’t know. Let’s see now. It was the year we had that blizzard.
MERVA
‘36?
ETHYL
No, not that long ago, Merva.
MELODY
What year do you think we’re living in?
MELODY
Well which blizzard?
MERVA
That one we had in April?
ETHYL
No, Merva! A different one! Or was it that dry spell . . . it was the year when–
MELODY
The drought!
ETHYL
Yes! By God, I think it was.
MERVA
Ethyl, can’t you just say By Golly?
ETHYL
By Golly. There. I said it. Are you happy now?
MERVA
Well, really.
(pause)
So which drought was it?
ETHYL
The really bad one. Went on forever.
MELODY
Well that narrows it down.
ETHYL
I remember Dad made us pump and pump and pump.
MERVA
Oh! That was an awful time.
MELODY
Did he have a beard then?
ETHYL
He always had a beard, Melody.
MERVA
Don’t you listen, Melody?
MELODY
But you said he doesn’t wear one now?
(pause)
ETHYL
No Melody.
(pause)
MERVA
Well I don’t remember him ever having a beard.
ETHYL
Well he had one!
MERVA
What about Jesse? Did we ever figure that out?
MELODY
He might have had.
ETHYL
Now who was that other one who always had a beard?
MERVA
Who?
ETHYL
Arnold.
MERVA
Jesse’s cousin?
ETHYL
I think that’s right.
MELODY
O.K., now he’s a son to which one.
ETHYL
Who? Jesse?
MELODY
Jesse.
MERVA
He’s Jerry’s boy, isn’t he?
ETHYL
No, that’s his cousin.
MERVA
Are you sure?
ETHYL
Pretty sure.
MERVA
First cousin?
ETHYL
Yes. He was adopted, remember? Elliot’s his dad.
MELODY
Oh! Elliot’s his dad!
MERVA
Wait. Which Elliot.
ETHYL
Wasn’t it Lester?
MELODY
No, Elliot.
MERVA
Which one?
MELODY
The one with the beard.
MERVA
The one at the funeral?
MELODY
That’s right.
MERVA
Well then that must be him.
ETHYL
Who?
MERVA
His boy.
ETHYL
Who must be?
MERVA
Jesse.
ETHYL
No, no, Jesse’s his nephew. Or great nephew. In law, I mean.
MELODY
Huh. I think maybe you’re right.
MERVA
No no, she’s all mixed up. You’re thinking of the other Elliot.
ETHYL (to MELODY)
Oh, you know what? You’re right.
(pause)
MERVA
Don’t be petty, Ethyl.
(pause)
MELODY
Anyway, I just don’t like beards on men.
ETHYL
She likes them on women!
MELODY
No, I mean itchy scruffy old things. I’ve never liked kissing them. I’d rather kiss a dead porcupine.
MERVA
Oh, you’re wicked, Melody!
ETHYL
I’ve got a dead raccoon that Weston shot.
MERVA
You want her to bring it over?!
MELODY
I don’t kiss raccoons!
ETHYL
Why not! You have something against raccoons?
MELODY
They’re disease-carriers.
ETHYL
He’s quite a catch. You better snatch him up.
MERVA
Does he have a beard?!
ETHYL
Who! The raccoon?!
MERVA
Yes!
ETHYL
No!
MELODY
Well maybe he shaved it!
MERVA
Oh darn! I for one love beards.
ETHYL
You don’t love anything, Merva.
MERVA
What on earth–? I at least love my husband, Ethyl.
MELODY
Now girls . . .
ETHYL
What are you saying, Merva?
MERVA
Nothing. Only that we at least sleep in the same bed together.
ETHYL
Not always.
MERVA
Oh yes we do.
ETHYL
Not the nights when Marvin sleeps over at my house!
MERVA
Ethyl, that’s not–
MELODY
Now girls, that’s not–
ETHYL
You keep out of it, Melody.
MERVA
There’s nothing to keep out of. Let it rest, since you can’t take anything seriously.
ETHYL
Oh, I take Marvin seriously. He’s like a carnival ride.
(MERVA gasps, is about to say something, then very deliberately purses her lips and sits quietly with head turned away and hands resting neatly on her lap. Silence. Beeping of heart monitor.)
MELODY
Well.
(pause)
Well what about sideburns?
ETHYL
I don’t wear them.
MELODY
Ha! Hahahahahahah.
(They cackle. MERVA tries hard to keep a straight face, but then succumbs and chuckles a bit. MELODY and ETHYL try to talk but all that comes out is jumbled chuckles.)
You kill me, Ethyl!
MERVA
Always a kidder.
ETHYL
Well, I kill a lot of people.
MELODY
She’s good at it.
(Their laughter dies down to silence. Beeping of heart monitor.)
(DAVE suddenly begins coughing.)
RUE
Say, you gettin a cold?
DAVE (still coughing)
Yeah, I guess so. It’s annoying.
RUE
You better take something.
DAVE (coughing)
Yeah.
(coughs heavily, nose running, eyes watering, sniffing wetly)
ETHYL
Say, that’s a nasty one.
DAVE
If it would just hurt I wouldn’t mind. It’s this damned itchy feeling like there’s a feather in my throat. Or something. Drives me crazy.
ETHYL
There might be some juice left in the fridge.
MELODY
Oh, yes, there is!
(goes to fridge, gets sealed cup of juice)
DAVE (to RUE)
Isn’t that for you or Allan?
RUE
No, no, you take it.
DAVE
O.K.
(takes juice from MELODY, opens and drinks it quickly. Throws empty container away and goes into “bathroom,” down center off stage in front of audience. Blows his nose wetly with toilet paper. He is clearly crying but trying not to. [The others do not see him, but can hear him blowing his nose.])
RUE (standing)
I think we can switch that off.
(switches heart monitor off again)
(DAVE continues blowing nose for some time, then sound of water running. He remains in bathroom.)
ETHYL
Well, we’d better be going.
(all three stand, begin to move toward door)
MELODY (somewhat uncomfortably)
Oh, my, yes. Look at the time.
MERVA
Look how late it’s getting.
MELODY
I had no idea it was so late.
ETHYL
We’ll pick you up some flowers in the gift shop, Carol, and bring them by tomorrow.
MERVA
Yes, we’ll be by again tomorrow with some flowers for you, Carol. I hope you don’t mind plastic ones. They’re just–they keep better.
ETHYL (to MERVA, whispering)
It’s the thought that counts, dear.
(to RUE)
Isn’t that right, Rupert.
RUE
Yes, that’s right.
MELODY
We’ll see you tomorrow. Don’t you worry.
ETHYL
She’s not worried. Look at her. Sleeping like a baby.
MERVA
The only thing she’s worried about is Allan.
MELODY
Yes. Poor Allan.
(pause)
ETHYL
He coming by?
RUE
Yeah, he should be here any minute. Don’s giving him a bath and then they were gonna bring him.
MELODY
That’s nice.
(pause)
ETHYL
Well, see you, Rupert.
RUE
Bye. Thanks for coming.
(DAVE returns from bathroom, remains standing near bathroom “door” at edge of stage, down center, facing them.)
MELODY
Yes, you take care, Rue.
MERVA
Be good.
(to CAROL)
Keep an eye on him, Carol. See that he keeps out of trouble.
ETHYL
Bye, David.
MERVA
Yes, bye bye David.
MELODY
We’ll see you soon. Take care.
DAVE
Bye. I’ll probly see you tomorrow.
ETHYL
Yes, sure, sure.
MELODY
Enjoy those brownies, Carol!
MERVA
Yes, Ruey? See that she eats some of those brownies.
RUE
I will. Thank you for bringing them by. That was really nice of you to go to all that trouble.
ETHYL (taddle-tale tone)
Oh, she didn’t even make them!
MERVA
Who says I didn’t.
MELODY
She bought them from the store!
MERVA
(complimentary with an undercurrent of resentment)
Well nothing I bake can compare with Carol’s baking.
MELODY
Yes, she always was quite the baker. Every time we’d go over there, she’d bring out pans of bars and goodies, right away.
MERVA
You’d never go hungry at her house.
ETHYL
I’ll never forget that.
MELODY
It’s too bad.
(pause)
ETHYL
Well, bye bye now.
MELODY
Bye!
MERVA
Take care!
RUE
We’ll see ya.
(They leave. RUE sits back down in his chair. DAVE gets a chair, moves it over next to right side of bed, sits.)
(silence)
DAVE
There should be a radio on in here or something.
RUE
Hm. Well, there’s the T.V. there, but . . .
(silence)
So how’re classes goin?
DAVE
Oh, fine. I’m not really in any classes, I guess.
RUE
What?
DAVE
No, just that paper.
RUE
Ah. That’s all you’ve got left then.
DAVE
Yeah.
RUE
Hmh.
(silence)
DAVE
So is grandpa coming?
RUE
Yeah, pretty soon here. He’s supposed to be.
DAVE
How’s he doing?
RUE
Oh, pretty good.
DAVE
Yeah?
RUE
Yeah, I’d say so. You know. All things considered.
DAVE
Yeah.
RUE
I don’t know. It’s hard to say, ya know. He just sits there in the chair and just stares at her and doesn’t say nothin.
DAVE
Well, what can he say.
RUE
Ya, that’s right.
(silence)
Well, I’m gonna go get some coffee. You want anything?
DAVE
Sure, I’ll have some.
(coughs)
RUE
O.K. You better take somethin for that cold.
DAVE
Yeah.
(RUE goes)
(Long silence. DAVE stares at CAROL.)
(DAVE stands, reaches out and touches her face, her hair. Strokes her hair. Sits back down. Stares at her. Wipes his eyes and nose. CAROL opens her eyes ever so slightly. DAVE leans over closer to her, stares into her eyes, says nothing.)
(SUSIE enters. She speaks very softly and as though to a small child, both to DAVE and to CAROL)
SUSIE
Hey there, David.
DAVE
Hey.
SUSIE
(goes around to opposite side of bed from DAVE, stands where RUE had been)
She still sleepin?
DAVE
Yeah.
SUSIE
(in the tone of “Ahh, isn’t that cute” or “Isn’t that too bad”)
Aoooh. Are you in any pain, Mom? Huh?
(takes CAROL’s hand out from under sheet, holds it)
Carol? Can you feel me holding your hand? Huh? Try and squeeze it if you can feel.
(pause)
No? Can you squeeze my hand, Carol?
(pause)
There she goes! You’re waking up, aren’t you. Yeah. Are you in pain? Try and squeeze my hand if you’re in pain, and we’ll push the button.
(pause)
Yes?
(pause)
No?
(pause)
Hm. I can’t tell. I think she’s trying to squeeze it. But maybe we shouldn’t give her any so she’ll be up when Allan gets here.
(pause)
(CAROL’s eyes open a bit more. Her mouth twitches but remains open wide, low moans resembling words come, but not enough energy to form.)
There you go. Yeah. It’s Aunty Suzie. Can you hear me? It’s Aunty Suzie, Carol.
(CAROL tries to speak.)
David’s here. You see David?
(Pause. DAVE stands, awkwardly.)
You wanna come ‘round here? I’ll get out of the way.
DAVE
(goes around opposite side where SUSIE had been.)
Hi, Gramma.
SUSIE
Tell her who you are.
DAVE (awkwardly)
It’s Dave, Gramma.
(CAROL tries to speak. It sounds vaguely like “I’m lonely. I’m so lonely.”)
I don’t think she can see me.
SUSIE
She might see you.
DAVE
I don’t think she knows who I am, though.
SUSIE
Ya, it’s hard to tell.
(DAVE goes around to other side of bed again. SUSIE takes his spot on left side, staring down at CAROL)
It must be hardest for her not to be able to talk. She’d never stop talking, you know.
DAVE
Yeah. Dad said a week or two ago she was talking in little bit still, and going on and on about her gnomes, just like always.
SUSIE
(as if to a child, sing-songy)
Aoooh. She’s trying to talk now. She’s tryin so hard to tell us somethin. Tryin sooo hard.
(Silence. CAROL tries to speak, as before.)
I love you, she’s saying. Yeah. We love you too. Everyone loves you.
(Pause. CAROL tries harder to speak.)
Yeah, you love us, doncha. Yeah.
(Pause. CAROL moans. Tries to speak.)
Yeah. She’s tryin sooo hard. She’s tryin so hard to tell us somethin.
(Long silence. CAROL tries to speak, moans, drifts off again into semi-consciousness.)
So how’s school?
DAVE
Fine.
SUSIE
You just about finished?
DAVE
Yeah, gettin there.
SUSIE
Takin a lotta classes?
DAVE
No.
SUSIE
Oh. That’s good.
(pause)
In any plays this semester?
DAVE
No. I kinda gave it up.
SUSIE
Oh, that’s too bad. When did you decide that?
DAVE
A long time ago, I guess.
(pause)
SUSIE
You kids are all so talented.
(pause)
(RUE returns with two cups of coffee.)
RUE
Hey. How are you doing, Suzie?
SUSIE
Oh, fine. How are you doing?
RUE
Oh, not too shabby.
(Hands cup to DAVE. Amused:)
I sat down to talk to Harold and fell right asleep. Right while he was talkin. I wake up and he’s still talkin away. I don’t think he even noticed.
SUSIE
Oh, where’s Harold?
RUE
In the lobby.
SUSIE
I’ll go say hi.
(Goes. Comes back.)
Oh, Ruey? I think she might need another shot of morphine but I don’t know.
RUE
Isn’t it automatic?
SUSIE
No, you have to push the button.
RUE
Really? How do you know when she needs it?
SUSIE
Well, ya, it’s hard to tell. If I think she might I just give it to her. Give her the benefit of the doubt.
RUE
Huh. Well what if no one’s here?
SUSIE
Yeah, I don’t know. Somebody has to be here, I guess.
RUE
I’ll have to ask the doctor about that when he comes. He was supposed to come yesterday but he never did.
SUSIE
Ya. Well you might wanna wait til Allan gets a chance to see her first before you give her any more. I don’t know. It looked like she might be waking up for a minute there. It’s up to you.
RUE
Yeah, O.K.
SUSIE
I’ll just be in the lobby.
RUE
All right.
(SUSIE goes.)
(silence)
She been awake at all then?
DAVE
No, not really.
RUE
Yeah, I didn’t really think so.
(silence)
I don’t know if I should push the button or not.
DAVE
Don’t ask me.
(pause)
(NURSE enters. She is clearly exhausted, somewhat disoriented.)
NURSE
Hi, Carol. How are you holding in there? You in any pain?
(squeezing her hand)
Can you feel me squeezing your hand, Carol?
(pause)
She been awake at all?
RUE
No.
NURSE
Well I’m just gonna check her blood pressure.
RUE
Oh. O.K. Doesn’t the machine do that?
NURSE
No.
RUE
Hmh.
(NURSE wraps sleeve around CAROL’s arm, pumps while looking from wrist watch to meter and back. The sleeve pops off.)
Oh, shoot.
(She begins to release air and rewrap it.)
Need a smaller one of these. Her arm’s too thin. The velcro doesn’t stay.
RUE
Say is this, uh . . .
(indicating I.V.)
On automatic?
NURSE
No, you have to press the button.
RUE
Oh, do ya? Well couldn’t we put her on a constant feed?
NURSE
Yeah, usually they do. I don’t know why she’s not.
RUE
Can you fix it?
NURSE
I can’t, no. I’m just an R.N. You’ll have to talk to the doctor.
RUE
He around?
NURSE
No, I don’t know right now. He should be by.
RUE
Yeah, that’s what I figured.
NURSE
Has she eaten anything today?
RUE
No, we tried to give her some mashed potatoes at lunch time, but she couldn’t really swallow it.
NURSE
Yeah, you don’t want to choke her.
RUE
No, that’s right.
(NURSE pushes a button, prints out a little receipt-like reading on the machine.)
If she don’t like what what we’re givin her we can take it back.
NURSE
Yeah, right!
(They laugh.)
Well I’m gonna turn her over and clean her now.
RUE
O.K.
(NURSE reads from a record hanging on wall, jots something down. RUE reads chart over her shoulder. Indicating CAROL.)
So what’s this position? Is that “back”?
NURSE
No, that’s left side.
RUE
Oh, that’s called left side, huh?
NURSE
Yup.
(Pulls curtain around bed. The bed is concealed except possibly on stage right side.)
RUE
Huh.
(pause)
Well, say, we should maybe just go out for a minute, hey Davey?
DAVE
O.K.
RUE
You wanna grab a bite?
DAVE
No, not really. But I wouldn’t mind a smoke.
RUE
O.K.
(to NURSE)
Say, ah, we weren’t sure if we should push the button or not. My dad’s–her husband’s comin later and we thought maybe she’d wanna be awake for him.
NURSE
Yes, I see.
RUE
So you give her what you think she needs then, all right? I’ll just leave it up to you.
NURSE
O.K. Have a nice lunch.
RUE
Yeah, O.K. You ever get to eat around here?
NURSE
Oh, sure.
RUE
I s’pose you been here all day, huh? Or are you just coming on, for the night.
NURSE
Oh no, I’ve been here since six this morning.
RUE
Wow. Long shift.
NURSE
Yeah, well, this way I get three days off a week.
RUE
Oh, that how it works?
NURSE
Yup.
RUE
Well, O.K. then. Thank you.
NURSE
Yup.
(RUE and DAVE go)
(NURSE turns CLARA, washes her with a sponge.)
(Rattling in hall, growing louder. Another nurse enters with food cart.)
SECOND NURSE
Nobody here?
NURSE
No, they just left. I guess I can pull this curtain.
(She opens curtain again all the way.)
SECOND NURSE
You want to try to feed her?
NURSE
I have no idea. We could try.
SECOND NURSE
I’ve got–
NURSE
What have you got.
SECOND NURSE
Some chicken, ice cream, and mashed potatoes. And juice.
NURSE
O.K., let’s try the potatoes.
(SECOND NURSE gets plate from cart)
You got a spoon?
SECOND NURSE
Here.
NURSE
(tries to feed CAROL the potatoes)
Carol? You wanna try to eat something? Huh? You wanna try and eat some potatoes?
(puts some in CAROL’s mouth)
Here comes the fire engine.
(puts a little bit more in)
Here comes the jet plane.
(a little more)
SECOND NURSE
Is she eating it?
NURSE
I don’t know. Not really.
SECOND NURSE
You need me for anything?
NURSE
No, thanks, I’ll manage.
SECOND NURSE
O.K.
(SECOND NURSE goes with cart)
NURSE
Carol? Can you swallow for me?
(pause)
Is your mouth dry? Here, I’m just gonna wet your lips a little bit, O.K.?
(Gets tiny sponge on a stick from glass of water on table. Rubs sponge on Carols’ lips. Her lips move barely perceptibly to drink.)
Yeah, your mouth’s pretty dry, isn’t it. Yeah. There we go. Just get a little moisture in there.
(CAROL chokes a bit, tries to cough as if something wet is permanently caught in her throat. [CAROL’s coughing should never be heavy hacking at all; merely a soft but strained effort to clear the throat.)
You wanna cough that up, don’t you.
(CAROL coughs)
I just wish I could cough for you.
(CAROL coughs some more)
You want some more water?
(She rubs more water on CAROL’s lips.)
There. Now let’s try this again. Here comes the airplane, into the hangar.
(puts some more potatoes in)
Can you swallow that for me? Huh?
(pause)
No?
(Pause. CAROL coughs futilely.)
If you can’t swallow them I’ll have to take them back out again. Don’t you want your potatoes, Carol?
(pause)
O.K. Well, you tried.
(Tries to remove potatoes with spoon. Then with her fingers.)
I don’t know, Carol. I’ll have to go and get someone, O.K.? You just stay right here and I’ll be right back, all right?
(NURSE goes)
(She stops at door as CAROL coughs.)
You gonna be all right for a minute?
(CAROL coughs)
One minute, O.K.?
(CAROL coughs)
(NURSE goes)
(CAROL continues to cough, becoming more red and struggling to breathe. She chokes. Tries to talk. [There is nothing violent about any of this. She has only the energy to attempt the bare minimum necessary to remain alive.] Speaks in a wheeze, as though through a hole in her throat. Sounds like “Allan” and “Allan” again, then “I’m so lonely, Allan,” but is not clear. Finally choking and slow wheezing stops. She tries to take one last breath. The heart monitor, still silent, goes to flatline.)
(long silence)
(FADE)
(END OF PLAY)